This morning I attended a board meeting. You may call me "Madame President." What an important title of the Pre-school Board. Okay. It isn't Wall Street, but we have important business that makes a big difference to 50 two to five year olds in our town. I moderated the meeting. I suggested motions to be made. I followed Roberts Rules of Order. Everything was decent and in order. Efficiency was rule of the day.
Then I got home feeling all competent and caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror. The lining of my shirt was poking out of the back of my shirt! Now, come on! No one noticed this? And those that did wouldn't say, "Hey, stick your collar in!" or "Let me fix that for you." I blame my husband first because I have asked him to look at me before I leave the house. "Make sure I'm presentable. Don't let me walk out the door with my skirt tucked in my panty hose." So, maybe he looked at my pants and decided I was okay. But, HERE! LOOK UP HERE! ALL OVER! How am I supposed to be competent and savy Madame President with the lining sticking out of the top of my shirt? I can't be competent and savy with wardrobe issues!! Does not the human resources guru who is the VEEP have some sort of responsibility to tell me I need tucking?? If I had all their email addresses here, I'd send out an email. "HEY! Did you guys notice my collar was untucked? Why don't you tell me next time? GEEZ!" I'm losing my confidence here if I can't even trust that I look like a Madame President should look.
I'm reminded of a story which became legend while I was in college. It seems that a certain female professor had her skirt tucked into her pantyhose. As she was walking up the stairwell in one of the academic buildings, another professor (a male) called her attention to it so that she could fix it. AND SHE HAD NO UNDERWEAR ON UNDER THE PANTYHOSE!!
So, as legends go, I have ruminated over some of the details such as this:
1. This certain woman had to go from her house to her car from her car across campus to the academic building. No one noticed before the stairwell?
2. If only the two professors were in the stairwell, how did the story get out that it happened at all and that no underwear was worn?
3. Why not wear underwear with pantyhose?
4. How long did the male professor debate before informing his colleague that she had wardrobe issues?
5. Does he think about her differently now?
6. Does this woman still lay awake at night sometimes and think "I have told Bob (or Hal or Mark or fill in her spouse's name here. Honestly, I don't know it) to look at me before I walk out the door. I've told him, 'Make sure I look presentable. Don't let me walk out of the house with my collar sticking out of my shirt' Doesn't he know he should look ALL OVER!?"
Best Selling Romance Author Jennifer Johnson
