Don't you love modern technology? I had this long code that I could go on the UPS site and I could find out where my books were. They went from Pennsylvania, stayed a while in West Virginia, and then spent part of the weekend in the UPS building in town. I thought about breaking in to get the box, but resisted the urge. I haven't had a lot of practice with breaking and entering, and chances are I would have gotten caught. Monday morning I checked with the code again. Wow! By nine in the morning the box was on the delivery truck. I found excuses to leave work so I could drive by once, twice, and then what the heck. I could wait a few more hours, couldn't I? So, I sat at my desk and checked the UPS website.
Is it there yet?
How about now?
Now? How about now? When it is going to get there??!! ARRRRGGHH! I saw that familiar brown truck outside. Could I wave him down and tell him I wanted my box of books, and I wanted it NOW!! Would that be considered harassment? Again, I resisted the urge NOT to be impatient and NOT to break any laws.
I went home. WHAT??!! Are you kidding me? Still no box? WHERE is it??
I reflected on my dog Shirley. Back in Mississippi where we used to live, she was an outside dog with a nice fenced in yard. The carport was at the back of the house, and the UPS man always brought our packages to the back. Shirley, who is no friend to strangers and especially strangers in brown uniforms, got to where she recognized the sound of the UPS truck when it turned onto our street. Her hackles would be raised and she would run back and forth inside the fence barking ferociously even before the guy could step onto the driveway. Oh, how excited she was when that BAD MAN would come and disrespectfully leave boxes in HER territory. She'd do her job of protecting the house and he'd always leave quickly without trying to break in or hurt her pack (me and the other humans living in the house).
Those were the days. Alas, she's inside now and can't hear as well as she used to. Rarely is she outside when the brown truck comes by. And there are these cats who now harass her by walking into the kitchen and trying to drink out of her water dish. CURSE THOSE CATS! THOSE SNEAKY CATS!
I amused myself for a while by thinking Shirley thoughts. I glared at the cats for good measure. Then I heard it. THE TRUCK! THE UPS TRUCK JUST TURNED ON OUR STREET! FOR ME! FOR ME! MY BOOKS ARE HERE! I ran to the front door and flung it open. Yes, there was the truck blocking the street right in front of my house, bless his heart! ME! ME! I KNOW YOU HAVE SOMETHING FOR ME! I met him on the porch stairs with hands outstretched.
GIVE ME! GIVE ME!
At last the fruition of my dreams was in my arms. I rushed inside and tore open the box.
My books! Here they are!
They are unique and beautiful. I read three chapters last night. Man. I don't remember the love scene being so racy. Whoa! Did I really write that? Yep. There's my name at the top of the page. Hey! Look there's that happy ending I love so much!
Dream accomplished. Now, I better go feed the dog.