Stop and Smell the Roses Winner (and a few jokes)

Thanks to all who posted with or without jokes. I put you all in the hat, and the winner is (drum roll)Tanya Hanson!

Here are some of your cute jokes and funny quips:

*"Headlines" from Readers Digest."University Wants Coach With an Offensive Mind",
"Birds Make Mess, City Steps In", "New Yorker Finds Roommate Dead, Second Time in Year."

*Is your refrigerator running? Yes? Then you better go catch it!

Who's there?
Interrupting cow.

*What do cows do for fun? They go to the moooovies, of course!

*What do you call cheese thats not yours? Any one? Nacho Cheese

*A baby seal walks into a club.....

*How do you lock a blond in the car? Take her car keys.

(Inserts muffled giggles) BOO-BEE

*I'm not a complete idiot--some parts are missing!

Consciousness: That annoying time between naps.

The trouble with life is there's no background music.

And finally....

I smile because I don't know what the heck is going on.

*Why doesn't it matter how often a married man changes his job?

Because he still ends up with the same boss.

::GROAN!!:: :-)

*This is probably a Laffy Taffy joke... But how does Adolf Hitler tie his shoes?

Have you guessed yet? I mean, really, this one is so obvious. But I just cracked up when I heard this ages ago. Yes, ages. It was one of those ah-ha moments where plays on words stuck in my mind...

In little Nazis.

Thanks for the smiles!